I myself had never had an experience like the ones I’ve been reading, But i know of someone who has But she never really seemed to accept it as rape, But everyone who she told Certainly did see it as rape. She was 17 at the time.
One of our friends was drunk at a friends party where we’d all been drinking (Some more than others), And this friend was throwing up and bringing himself down and others around him, So we decided it would be best to let him sleep it off
So the host of the party took him into the spare room, But when my friend went to leave she didn’t think that he should be left alone, So she woke him up and when someone came to pick her up He went with her.
The next day she contacted me saying that when they’d got home, she’d let him get into her bed with her, And she’d tried to sleep, But he’d kissed her and started to try to have sex with her
He managed to go through with it And after it all she left him to sleep in her bed, Whilst she went and hid in the bathroom until the morning.
She said that when it’d happened she’d ‘looked into his eyes’ and saw that it wasn’t him really raping her and it was because he was drunk.
I hated that she saw it this way, And told her that i was going to the police, But she begged me not to because it would ruin his life and hers, And her being a close friend I trusted her and i never said anything in the end (I regret not going to the police now)
And I remember asking if she’d told her parents and she said no because her dad would kill him, I regret not telling them as well, Not that I wanted him dead It’s just that they being mature and smart thinking adults wouldn’t have stood by and let him get away with what he did…
But a year after that happened (At the same hosts party) the offender was walking around telling everyone what had happened and that he was, yes, a rapist. Some people felt sympathetic towards him and said things like ‘Oh you were drunk you didn’t mean it, She must have been asking for it cause we know that you’re a better person than that’ And others felt the same way i did and either wanted to beat him for what he did Or go to the police.
But nothing was ever done about it, And as far as I know no adults ever found out about it.
And I just hate that it happened to her and that I stood by and let her convince me to let him get away with it…